Whether you’re at a party with friends or trying to start a conversation with people you’ve just met, you can sometimes be at a loss on what to say. Conversations among close friends tend to come and go smoothly because you already know each other. You are familiar with each other’s topic of conversations.
However, the struggle happens when you want to get to know someone better or you want to strike a conversation with someone you just met. You just don’t know what to say. Even small talks become a challenge.
They say having a few drinks is a great icebreaker and a good excuse for someone to open up. There’s no way though that you can easily get a person drank without having to offer them a drink first. There’s also the off chance that the person notices your intention right away.
This tactic is not foolproof and doesn’t work all the time. If you’re one of those guys who want to get to know the woman he likes better or charm your crush, then getting her drunk is definitely a risk you don’t want to take. Your best option is to find the right topic that would steer to a good conversation, and who knows, to a good relationship.
Most girls love to tell stories about themselves but also feel nervous and shy. A surefire way to get her to talk is to ask specific questions that may target her interests. Topics about movies, songs, food, holidays, work, and so on, might spark long answers.
However, not all girls love to share their opinions right away. They need to establish trust first before they can truly open up. In this situation, it’s better to ask open-ended questions and you can improvise with a few details. You should never pry information out and let the answers come naturally.
Another thing to remember is being intuitive. When you ask, she is bound to reciprocate with her own set of questions. Try not to clam up and use common sense in your responses. It’s best to also have backup questions ready.
Also, be mindful of the information you share. In your attempt to create a connection, you might be sharing or asking for more personal details than necessary.
However, knowing a good conversation starter is not all there is to it. You also need to know when to ask the right questions at the right time. You have to be prepared for all scenarios so you are more relaxed, and when this happens, then the talk goes smoothly.
We know all these reminders tend to go out the window once you’re in that situation already. That’s why we have rounded up some tips and gathered over a hundred questions that you can ask a girl, whether on a date, at work, at a party, or at any situation where you just want to have an inspiring one-on-one conversation with someone you like.
Questions To Ask At A Party
It can be nerve-wracking or intimidating to talk to the girl you like when you see her at a party. It can be a challenge to get her attention especially when she’s with her friends or other people.
If she knows you already then it wouldn’t be so hard to open with pleasantries. If she somehow has an inkling that you like her, then it could go two ways: she walks away or entertains your interest.
Regardless, you still have to find ways to single her out and eventually, get the two of you talking together. It always pays to find the right things to say to her and you could pick a conversation based on your surroundings.
Of course, before you ask away, you need to set the mood first. You catch her eye first regardless if she’s alone or with friends. Then you approach, smile, and greet everyone warmly (create a positive impression).
Remember, her friends are going to be your best advocates. At this point, it’s also important to angle your body toward the girl that you like to convey your interest. Once her friends realize what you’re trying to do, they’ll make way.
Then you strike up a conversation. You can start by asking how she feels about the party and pick up from there. If you’re the ballsy type, you can go straight with mild flirtation. Below you can find a list of questions you can ask to keep the conversation interesting.
- Hi, I couldn’t help but overhear that you think this (event) is great/boring/so-so. Why do you think so? (If you feel the same you can say, “I couldn’t agree more with you.”)
- Hey there. Off all the many faces in this room, yours sparked my interest. I hope you don’t mind me saying that.
- If you could be somewhere else right now, where would it be and why?
- Do you feel like yourself during parties?
- Where’s one place you feel most like yourself?
- Do you feel comfortable talking to strangers?
- Do you believe in fate or free will?
- Do you have problems accepting compliments?
- Do you want another drink?
- What’s your favorite party drink and why?
- Have you blacked out from too much alcohol during a party? What happened if you don’t mind me asking?
- Have you ever had an embarrassing moment at a party?
- If you could speak to anyone at this party, who would you choose, why, and what would you say?
- What’s the most daring thing you’ve done at a party?
- What’s your most memorable experience at a party?
- What age do you feel right now and why?
Questions To Ask On A Date
If you’ve come to this list then we take it that you’ve broken the proverbial introduction jitters and you’ve both agreed to meet again. Congratulations! You’re about to go on a date.
We know you’re teeming with excitement just thinking about that day. We also know you’re anxious, since you’d be talking to her alone in an intimate setting.
Contrary at the party, this time you’d have to devote your attention to her. There’s no blaring music or a crowd of people to get your thoughts lost into and no friends to break the awkwardness with a quick hello. It’s only going to be her and you.
The thought is daunting, nevertheless exciting since it could lead to more dates. Then you’d be on your way to getting to know her on a more personal and deep level when you officially become a couple.
People can have different ideas for their first date. Usually, it’s over dinner, coffee, or anywhere else where you can talk leisurely and enjoy each other’s company.
There are important things to consider including the ambiance and importantly, making a good first impression. Just because you’ve successfully asked her out on a date doesn’t mean you stop impressing her.
It may seem cliché but you can never go wrong with giving her flowers. If she’s getting the sniffles, don’t jump to conclusions. She may just be allergic so at least now you know not to do it again.
Then, of course, there’s the conversation part again. You still have to be careful what you ask and say to keep the date going smoothly.
You want to make the exchange interesting but reserve a few details for the second date. The questions below can serve as a guide but as always, it’s important to ask earnestly and answer truthfully.
- Have you lived in (name of city) all your life?
- Tell me about your hometown…
- What are your plans after graduation?
- Do you know which university you want to go? Why there?
- What do you do? Do you enjoy your job?
- What do you usually do after work?
- Have you always wanted to be a (name of profession)?
- What’s one food that you can’t live without?
- What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten (or done)?
- If you could work in one place, which would it be and why?
- If you could live in another country or city, where would it be and why?
- Do you often keep in touch with your friends? (you can mention those you met at the party. This means you’re interested in knowing her circle of friends).
- I’d love to hear about your family…
- What’s your favorite season?
- Chicken, beef, or pork?
- Is your job or career something you plan to do forever?
- Are you as excited as I am about (name an event, movie, book)? You may find something of mutual interest.
- What’s the best thing that happened to you last week or in the past month?
- Have you ever been away from home? What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from?
- Have you had any worst jobs?
- What was the last movie you watched and did you enjoy it? (this helps determine which genre she likes so you can ask her out on a movie date).
- Have you traveled to other countries? Which was your favorite?
- What was your worst first/last date?
- If you had a day left to live, what would you do?
- What’s one thing you’re afraid to ask a man but you really want to?
- If money was not an issue, what’s your ideal job?
- What do you usually do in your free time?
- What was the most stimulating conversation you’ve ever had?
- Which romantic gesture do you think is overrated? (This way you’d know to avoid them).
- Can you remember the last time you complimented a stranger?
- Do you like long drives? (If so, you can ask which song or music playlist she listens to. This way you’d know which type of music she likes).
- Where do you escape to when you want a quiet moment by yourself?
- Are you an avid social media user? (If so, you can expound on which app she prefers or what she likes to share most. This is an indirect way to share Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram info.)
- Do you like to travel often? What’s the one place in your travels that you’d love to visit over and over again?
- Would you prefer living in one place for a long time or stay in different places and move around?
- What’s one thing you’ve always wanted to try? (This gives you the chance to ask her out to do it or for you to join her).
- What’s one thing that you could/couldn’t live without?
- What’s the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen? (This brings out her and your sentimental side).
- If you could learn something new, what is it and why?
- Are you a morning person or a night person? (This helps you know when not to bother her with calls or texts.)
- What’s your favorite movie or book character and why?
- Do you love animals and do you have a pet?
- Do you know that our height is matched by the width from our fingertips on each hand? (This gives you an excuse to hold her hand).
- Do you think men and women can be friends? Or is there always going to be chemistry between them?
- What’s your favorite day or holiday?
- Who would you spend time with if you were stuck in the elevator and why?
- What’s the longest you’ve gone without sleep?
- Do you feel comfortable hanging out with people you don’t know?
Questions To Ask A Girl If You're In A Relationship
The way to a healthy and strong relationship is knowing each other’s weakness and strengths, likes and dislikes. One way to achieve this is through communication.
Any relationship needs constant communication and honesty, above all else. Just because you’re already in this stage doesn’t mean you stop trying to know the other person better. In fact, this is the most challenging part of any relationship.
One thing that’s constant is change and people can change as the years go by. Depending on the situation, your girlfriend or wife may no longer be as caring or sweet as she was when you first started the relationship.
A few personal traits may have changed or disappeared and she may have acquired new ones. Several factors can contribute to these changes.
However, no matter these changes, the important thing is you let her know that you’re there for her physically and mentally. This is why, when you’re in a relationship you find time to talk with each other.
You can ask about mundane things like how her day at work went, and if she did anything interesting or met new friends. This is to show that you still find her interesting and to let her know that you want to be a part of her life.
By this time, you probably already know some of her healthy and unhealthy habits, met her family and close circle of friends, and know some few personal details. If you don’t, then no worries, since you’ll still learn more about her in the course of your relationship.
There are great conversation starters to have between couples. You may find the questions below helpful.
- What’s the most illegal thing you’ve done?
- What are the three most interesting thing about you that I don’t already know? (This gives you a chance to discover them for yourself or a way for her to prove them to you).
- What was the most memorable and sentimental gift you’ve ever received?
- What’s the strangest or weirdest gift you’ve ever received?
- Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character and why?
- What’s the theme song of your life?
- How different was your life a year (or so) ago? (This gives you a chance to revisit some happy memories and redo them).
- What’s your best childhood memory?
- What’s your least favorite word and why?
- “What would be on the gag reel of your life?”
- What’s your favorite body part of the opposite sex?
- Which fictional character do you think is boring in real life?
- What would you do if you won the lottery?
- What was the worst pickup line you’ve heard?
- What do think of most of the time?
- Is there one thing that you’d never do again?
- Will you quit your job if you won the lottery?
- Would you rather have beauty or brains? (This gives you an opportunity to compliment her or tell her that she has both).
- What were the turning points of your life? (This helps you understand her journey and learn about her past experiences).
- What do you fear most and why?
- What personality trait do you value most and which do you dislike? (You can use her response to improve yourself).
- If you could only have five possessions, what would they be?
- Which do you prefer to live in, indoors or outdoors?
- What’s the best and worst thing about aging?
- What about me made you fall in love? (Relieve those giddy moments)
- Can you see spending the rest of your life with just one person?
- If you were given a million dollars to sleep with some other guy, would you do it?
- “How do you think we’re similar to one another?”
- What do you consider as cheating in a relationship?
- “Is trust something you believe can be rebuilt?”
- What makes our relationship different from your past relationships?
- What about me first attracted you?
- Do you think our connection or feelings for each other remain strong or has it weakened?
- Are there things that you’d rather do on your own than we do it together?
- Are there things you want to experience that our relationship is stopping you?
- What would make you leave a relationship or someone you love?
- Were there ways that you’ve shown how much you love me that I just haven’t picked up on?
- Would you give a cheater a second chance?
- “What does family mean to you?”
- Would you want me to tell you if I found someone else attractive?
- Would you tell me if ever you feel tempted to cheat on me with someone else?
- Would you want me to tell you if I was tempted to cheat on you with another woman?
- Do you think I take things in our relationship for granted?
- Are there certain things that you want us to do together?
- Are there things that we’ve never done that you really want us to do?
- What little things in our relationship do you think you sometimes take for granted?
- Will you trust me with your deepest secret?
- Which of your parents do you hope to grow up to be?
- Do you like pet names? If so, which ones do you find the cutest or sweetest?
- Can you honestly say that you love and admire yourself?
- What are you most proud of in all your achievements?
Here’s a friendly reminder when talking to someone. You may have all the right questions in the world, but if you don’t show sincerity then your efforts are futile.
The most important part is to listen attentively to her answers and on how she replies. You need to acknowledge her responses appropriately with the right words and not just nod in acknowledgment.